A Night with Supreme Court Justice Sonya Sotomayor

There was excitement and energy swerving, like some invisible presence, throughout the Winter Garden before the arrival of Supreme Court Justice Sonya Sotomayor on the early eve of Friday, October 12, 2018. All library staff who had volunteered stood calm and ready in that vast windowed hall, waiting for the groups of people, who had lined up outside the building, to come in and then up nine floors to hear the lawyer speak. The Justice arrived just as the sky turned velvet black outside turning the air even crisper with the Chicago cold.

Just as high anticipation filled that room a couple hours before, the moments right before the event were, without a doubt, full of energy of a different kind. There was, indeed, a presence in the room. Sotomayor's presence was radiant, strong, gentle, and supportive; to say this more clearly, if possible: it felt as if the fragile foundations which define our relationships with one another, whether stranger, friend, family, or foe, would never break, were made more sturdy. It was, truly, an aura of hope.

She sat on a large, elegant, and soft chair on a little stage along with her interviewer. A group of children sat directly in front of this stage, on the floor, with their curious and critical eyes staring upward at the lawyer they had heard so much about. The press stood on smaller tiers farther back, their cameras in front and the the olive trees, lit up by florescence, behind.

Justice Sotomayor began with a welcoming smile. She looked around at the crowd, careful to take her surroundings and every person in. There was something unusually warm and personal about her, something sincere hard to find in anyone these days, but especially in anyone involved with politics.

After a few initial questions from the interviewer, Sotomayor told the crowd that she couldn't just sit down. She intended to walk while talking. That is, walk through the crowd, looking at everyone, every single person, and occasionally stop to hug or offer her hand to anyone willing. And that's exactly what she did as she answered questions and told us about her experiences. 

There are a few things that stood out prominently. 

She told a story about how, when she was young, she was doing poorly in school. She kept doing poorly, and it made her feel worse when her teacher decided to start giving out gold stars to those who did well. There was one girl in her class who received many gold stars. She wanted one, too. So one day, she went up to that girl and asked, "How do you get all those stars?" And that girl told her how studied, how she read, and how she took notes. And following her, Sonya began to receive gold stars. That girl and Sonya are still friends to this day. In fact, a few months ago, she was the person who married that girl and her now husband. During her wedding speech, her friend said jokingly, my biggest regret is teaching Sonya how to study, because now she has more gold stars than me! The lesson Sonya wanted to illuminate was that many people forget that the easiest way to achieve something is just to ask. Go up, and ask. We do this when we are young, but forget to once we reach a certain age. We should continue to ask, she urged. 

Transitioning from this story, she told another anecdote. She was at a restaurant once, and she pulled out her needle to go ahead and give herself the medication prescribed to her for diabetes. She heard a person, at another table just next to her, say, "She must be addicted to drugs." And Sonya turned around and explained the situation. But she was so upset that someone would just assume something like that. In comparison to this, an at event where there were children, she pulled out her medication needle, and a child saw. He was curious and watched from a distance, then became so interested and went up to her and simply asked, "What are you doing?" And she explained to him what she was doing. The simple act of asking can change the world. 

When asked why she became a lawyer, her answer was simple. Sometimes, people have problems with their relationships with other people. They have problems with their family members, or they have problems with their neighbor, or they have problems with their friends, or their co-workers. And a lawyers' job is to help people and try to solve those problems. It's essentially about helping people, she said. And that's why she is a lawyer. 

She smiled and hugged the child who asked, and moved on.

Another question was along the lines of, what was your proudest moment? Her answer was a poignant one. She was being sworn in as Supreme Court Justice. She looked across the room and she saw the then President Obama, the First Lady Michelle Obama, and Vice President Joe Biden. And she felt so happy and proud. But then she looked right in front of her. And she saw her entire family and all her friends, a lot who came from Puerto Rico, a lot from all over the United States, and some from all over the world. And she would not have felt as proud if they had not been there. If her friends and family had not been there, the moment would not have meant as much to her. And she said that she worked hard and got to the top, but the most important thing that she did was bring her family and friends with her. She did not forget about them. That, plus being with some of the most powerful people in the country, was her proudest moment. 

What do you like to do when you are not working? was another. Cook with friends, go shopping with friends, go to the movies, etc. etc. Because friends are the people who are supposed to make you happy she said. She also said her favorite books are fantasy books, with monsters and witches and trolls. She also told the crowd that she has to read about 300 pages of work each day and sometimes she falls asleep while reading. 

Sotomayor said something else too that may have been hard for a lot of the older people in the room to swallow. She said, I get scared sometimes, about the political situation, about the world. But I turn that fear into work, and I work so I don't have to be scared anymore. One thing that scares her is that many Americans do not know the three branches of government. She added this - that the older generation failed the children - that the older generation failed to provide a good, safe foundation for the young ones in this world, and that we have to make sure that this doesn't happen again. 

She went to a cafe in Puerto Rico once and had a coffee and enjoyed the smells and sights and sounds, especially the sound of the coo-coo-ca-roo which is made by some bug or animal there. She stayed awhile, and when she got up to leave, she looked for the owner so he could bless her before she left. In Puerto Rico, it's part of their culture and tradition to have the oldest person bless the person leaving the room. But as she asked the old man to do this, he refused, saying that she didn't need a blessing, because sometimes you can see that there are angels following that person. I think this touched her very deeply.

As Sonya Sotomayor was answering these questions and telling these stories, she continued to walk within the crowd, shaking hands and hugging children and adults alike, making sure everyone got a chance to look her straight in the eye. And finally she came around to me. And she approached me and shook my hand. And in that moment I realized there are plenty of things you can say without opening your mouth once. Because eyes can speak, too. 

When I met her again after waiting in line to get my books signed I told her this: "Thank you so much for this sincerely supportive and inspiring night. I know it was mostly for the children, but I got so much out it even as an adult in my 30s. I'll carry that experience with me forever." And she replied, "Thank you so much for saying that. When hard times come, it is the good memories we look back on to keep us going."

- F

My Book Blog

Just in case: To Read & To Write

- F

Official Chicago Public Library Blogger!

Hi,

FYI: I now officially blog for the Chicago Public Library website! All my posts can be found via this link (there will be more, obviously, as time passes): Felicia's CPL Blogger Profile

- F

Thoughts on Tim Burton's "The Nightmare Before Christmas" (1993)

Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) is a Halloween classic for many people. Not a cult classic, but a classic nonetheless. While perhaps there is some wariness from the intellectual cohort, whomever they may be at any given time, saying things like “The Nightmare Before Christmas is the most overrated Halloween movie” etc. etc., I think the film deserves some thought. Indeed, much more thought.

I saw the film in the movie theater with my father when I was six years old. I was absolutely fascinated. For one thing, the animation in this film was like nothing I’d ever seen before. Contrary to the flat, two-dimensional animations of Disney’s princess movies, The Nightmare Before Christmas’s use of stop-motion animation added something almost tactile to my experience, really honing in an idea of the man-made, the creation and the creator, and the idea of building, which, I think, are all thematic components of the film itself.

Moreover, the film isn’t quite scary. It is a smart film, and children rarely get to see smart films which draw so much direct attention to the uncanny, and where the uncanny is not directly associated with evil. We all know Jack, the King of Halloween Town. And Sally and the doctor and the Mayor, and all the other citizens of Halloween Town. Although they like to scare people out of their wits, it is not a malicious violence, but something playfully disturbing instead. And furthermore, the story presents these characters as naïve, unaware of any world outside of their own, making them seem innocent and unworldly. To be presented with characters in a film such as this, that aren’t quite aware of the difference between right and wrong, is a refreshing thing for a child to see, especially when it’s explicit content is the ugly, the evil, the menacing, and the grotesque. These are characters disturbing and troubling, yes, but not so much what we can really pinpoint as evil.

It’s important to focus on Jack. Jack, feeling truly depressed after serving as the Pumpkin King of Halloween for many years, begins to dig deep to find out the source of his depression. He sings about it, and from his song we learn that Jack is tired of the sameness every year, the same actions and reactions, the same joke over and over again. I find his lyrics moving, and there’s a reason why his song is titled Jack’s Lament:

There are few who'd deny, at what I do I am the best

For my talents are renowned far and wide

When it comes to surprises in the moonlit night

I excel without ever even trying

With the slightest little effort of my ghostlike charms

I have seen grown men give out a shriek

With the wave of my hand, and a well-placed moan

I have swept the very bravest off their feet.

Yet year after year, it's the same routine

And I grow so weary of the sound of screams

And I, Jack, the Pumpkin King

Have grown so tired of the same old thing…

Oh, somewhere deep inside of these bones

An emptiness began to grow

There's something out there, far from my home

A longing that I've never known

I'm a master of fright, and a demon of light

And I'll scare you right out of your pants

To a guy in Kentucky, I'm Mister Unlucky

And I'm known throughout England and France!

And since I am dead, I can take off my head

To recite Shakespearean quotations -

No animal nor man can scream like I can

With the fury of my recitations.

But who here would ever understand

That the Pumpkin King with the skeleton grin

Would tire of his crown, if they only understood

He'd give it all up if he only could

Oh, there's an empty place in my bones

That calls out for something unknown

The fame and praise come year after year

Does nothing for these empty tears…

How can one not feel some sort of sympathy for a creature so obviously stuck in a place that he is sick of? It is not so much a yearning for something more, but instead, a yearning of new knowledge: there’s got to be something besides this, Jack seems to say. It is the fact that his world has lost all meaningfulness because it has become such a routine, something that has come to the point, for him, of going through the motions.

For those that have seen the movie, we know that Jack walks far enough from Halloween town one night, stuck in a daze of melancholy. And we know that he finds the circle of trees, each one with a different door symbolic of the holiday within. He happens to fall through the door with an evergreen tree on it, representing Christmas Town. And, as anyone would be, he becomes full of wonder and awe as he sees happiness, snow, joyous creatures, in-tune song, bright lights, presents, ornaments, and Santa Claus. He becomes determined to figure out how to bring the feeling – wonder and awe – back with him to Halloween Town.

This next part I find fascinating. Jack, in good spirits, attempts to explain Christmas Town to the citizens of Halloween Town, and any child would even know that something is well, not quite right. The citizens think that presents are supposed to be surprises full of dead animals, limbs off of human carcasses… read on:

[JACK]
Listen, there were objects so peculiar
They were not to be believed
All around, things to tantalize my brain
It's a world unlike anything I've ever seen
And as hard as I try
I can't seem to describe
Like a most improbable dream
But you must believe when I tell you this
It's as real as my skull and it does exist
Here, let me show you
This is a thing called a present
The whole thing starts with a box
[DEVIL]
A box?
is it steel?
[WEREWOLF]
Are there locks?
[HARLEOUIN DEMON]
Is it filled with a pox?
[DEVIL, WEREWOLF, HARLEQUIN DEMON]
A pox
How delightful, a pox
[JACK]
If you please
Just a box with bright-colored paper
And the whole thing's topped with a bow
[WITCHES]
A bow?
But why?
How ugly
What's in it?
What's in it?
[JACK]
That's the point of the thing, not to know
[CLOWN]
It's a bat
Will it bend?
[CREATURE UNDER THE STAIRS]
It's a rat
Will it break?
[UNDERSEA GAL]
Perhaps its the head that I found in the lake
[JACK]
Listen now, you don't understand
That's not the point of Christmas land
Now, pay attention
we pick up an oversized sock
And hang it like this on the wall
[MR. HYDE]
Oh, yes! Does it still have a foot?
[MEDIUM MR. HYDE]
Let me see, let me look
[SMALL MR. HYDE]
Is it rotted and covered with gook?
[JACK]
Hmm, let me explain
There's no foot inside, but there's candy
Or sometimes it's filled with small toys
[MUMMY AND WINGED DEMON]
Small toys
[WINGED DEMON]
Do they bite?
[MUMMY]
Do they snap?
[WINGED DEMON]
Or explode in a sack?
[CORPSE KID]
Or perhaps they just spring out
And scare girls and boys
[MAYOR]
What a splendid idea
This Christmas sounds fun
Why, I fully endorse it
Let's try it at once
[JACK]
Everyone, please now, not so fast
There's something here that you don't quite grasp
Well, I may as well give them what they want
And the best, I must confess, I have saved for the last
For the ruler of this Christmas land
Is a fearsome king with a deep mighty voice
Least that's what I've come to understand
And I've also heard it told
That he's something to behold
Like a lobster, huge and red
And sets out to slay with his rain gear on
Carting bulging sacks with his big great arms
That is, so I've heard it's said
And on a dark, cold night
Under full moonlight
He flies into a fog
Like a vulture in the sky
And they call him Sandy Claws
Well, at least they're excited
Though they don't understand
That special kind of feeling in Christmas land
Oh, well...

Jack “gets” it even in some small way: that’s the point of the thing, not to know – he says, when describing what the present is. And there he hits the jackpot, maybe the point, for him too, is to not get so caught up in the meaning of Christmas in order to recreate it, but instead, to enjoy the feeling he received when he experienced it for himself, if only for a short while. But he doesn’t get this, and oh how sorry I felt and still feel upon watching him borrow the Doctor’s supplies and tools and then try to run experiments on the objects, looking for the meaning of Christmas by first reading “the Scientific Method” then trying to analyze a snowglobe or an ornament! The problem with studying these objects is that they are simply visions, nothing more; creations, similar to the ones in Halloween Town, meant to celebrate a holiday, whose meaning itself, must be found out through story and myth.

Jack, who ends up ruining Christmas as he tries to “help” Sandy Claws (even as he tries to fully immerse himself in Christmas Town, he can’t quite relinquish his innate need for the horrific and thus names “Santa Claus”, “Sandy Claws”), finally realizes that he’s made a huge mistake:

[JACK]
What have I done?
What have I done?
How could I be so blind?
All is lost, where was I?
Spoiled all, spoiled all
Everything's gone all wrong
What have I done?
What have I done?
Find a deep cave to hide in
In a million years they'll find me
Only dust and a plaque
That reads, "Here Lies Poor Old Jack"
But I never intended all this madness, never
And nobody really understood, well how could they?
That all I ever wanted was to bring them something great
Why does nothing ever turn out like it should?
Well, what the heck, I went and did my best
And, by God, I really tasted something swell
And for a moment, why, I even touched the sky
And at least I left some stories they can tell, I did
And for the first time since I don't remember when
I felt just like my aold bony self again
And I, Jack, the Pumpkin King
That's right, I am the Pumpkin King, ha, ha, ha
And I just can't wait until next Halloween
'Cause I've got some new ideas
that will really make them scream
And, by God I'm really gonna give it all my might
Uh oh, I hope there's still time to set things right
sandy Claws, hmm

And yes, we know that Jack wasn’t malicious, he didn’t want to ruin anything, he just wanted to have a bit of fun, so we forgive him. And we are happy that he realizes, that yes, he did “taste something swell”, he did “touch the sky”, and he did create “some stories they can tell”. And there again, he hits the jackpot: it’s the story, in the end, that creates the most wonderful feeling of all, and it does not have to produce meaning – it does not have to produce any object at all – but instead wonder and awe in the vision itself.

- F