Sunday, March 15, 2020

Notes from Orchids After Dark: Brilliance" - the 2020 Orchid Show at the Chicago Botanic Garden

Before you read this post, please read my previous post on last year's orchid show to give you a more comprehensive idea of what the orchid is: https://feliciaisspellbound.blogspot.com/2019/03/on-orchids-notes-from-in-tropics-2019.html

The Orchid Show at the Chicago Botanic Garden, this year titled "Brilliance", was absolutely amazing. While one of the staff told us right before we entered that this year's show was more "chic" and "sleek" than those held before, which, with all due respect, it was, my take would have been that the show enhanced the technological side of things, with lights, structures, and design in order to illuminate an idea of the orchid apart from something merely ecological and natural. Albeit the consideration of all wild things as, at times, harsh and vicious, this exhibit went a step further by approaching the unnatural side of the systems regarding this mysterious flower, organic all the same. 

I say unnatural because many of the orchids presented at the show were *bred* by scientific experts. While many, including myself, might think of the caricature of a mad scientist concocting some awful invention out of sheer delight in competition's spoils - i.e. the greed of dominance and power - what I gathered from my experience at this show was not of that sense at all. Instead, I really felt a sensibility rooted in playfulness, creativity, and a survivalism not worth the name if not in the name of art itself.


Unlike the years prior, Dan and I went on February 14th, Valentine's Day, for a special viewing of show called Orchids After Dark. We arrived about a half hour before dusk, so we were able to see the orchids within various moments in-between the time the sun set and nightfall. In the entry hall, glass slides of various colours hung from the ceiling, letting in prisms of light from the sun as well as from electricity. 


We ate a little and ordered pretty, delicious drinks that held a floating orchid at the very top. We sipped and continued to proceed within the exhibition rooms. Acid jazz played in the background while people walked around, gazing.

The opening hallway was gorgeous as usual, this time filled with triangular luminescent lights every few steps, going from ceiling to floor, shelves holding more orchids able to be seen through the transparent facade. Look:



There was definitely a vibe. As we entered the first greenhouse, the sun was still brightly lighting up everything from the hot ceilings above, its warmth reaching down to all the plants and our skin. There were neon lights of different colours in their slim glass tubes, each backlighting the form of the numerous orchid blossoms, each stem using the long electric vials as support. Natural or not, the interplay between these two forms, the world of the biological along with the manmade object, was a really fascinating combination to gaze at. Of course, the blue lights along with the purple orchids caught my eye immediately, those being two of my favorite colours.




It was unusually striking to see these displays; typically when I think of places with backlights and neon signs like these I think of sticky, greasy, smelly, grime-y places where people grind up on each other while downing rum and tequila (places I used to love... and maybe still do). But this was a dry, clean place. So I discovered it was possible to backlight and use fluorescent neon without making a place look cheap and tacky. And it held the exact same kind of energy, but more finely tuned, more focused, and more intentional, less unconsciously swerving. I mean, no one was dancing. I had forgotten how cool hot pink could be; it was really inspiring to see it used in a space that didn't remind me of Saved By The Bell.


OK. Admittedly, maybe this was just a little like my dream Barbie doll house. 




One of the finest evolutionary accomplishments of orchids is that they are rich in genetic diversity. What this means for this flower is good health and more chances of survival even in times of environmental stress. Orchids are flowering plants that can withstand.





The sun started to get lower and lower as we entered the other greenhouse rooms. One of them held a green river made of tiny, tiny rocks and pebbles. The whole river was enchanting, though I don't know what exactly was lighting it up. For a while, for some vague time period, I was somewhat wary of the color green, for unknown reasons. Not evergreen, like dark greens, the colours of fir trees. But lighter greens. I have, of late, been warming to it, feeling safe in it again, and this display was helping me. 





As the dusk grew darker and turned to night, the orchid colours really began to pop and show, at turns deeper and brighter hues. They were mesmerizing as they seemed to look and see their audience too, displayed fully, hanging soft organisms unfurled, eyeless, sensing. 






As you have probably been able to tell, there were plenty of other kinds of plant life besides orchids there, too. Many were desert plants, some others I'm not sure of. Despite their small size/s, the plants made me, too, feel really, really small... not in a humble way, nor in a belittled way. But small-like. They made me feel similar to them, and I felt the power of the fae about. Of course, this could've been my imagination running 'round, going away with itself as it does. In any case, I felt a surge of protective energy that warmed me inside as much as I was warmed by the greenhouse atmosphere. I felt lit up. 






There really wasn't a scent, per se, I think all the scents were mixed together, and when I tried to smell a particular flower I couldn't really catch anything what with all the people too. But nevertheless, I breathed differently here, like I do when I visit most gardens and when I walk within the forested areas. I breathe more clearly and deeply, relieved with each healing intake of air. 

It became full-on night and all the glass was penetrated by the dark outside without any light save for the florescent bulbs. We made our rounds through the greenhouses once again. 





As we said goodnight to these magical, potent survivors of harsh circumstance, these purveyors of beauty and subliminal artistic expression, we exited, smiled, and looked at one another truly.

"You gonna eat that?" Dan asked, pointing to orchid head at the bottom of my glass.

"Yeah. I think I will," I replied. I slowly dipped my fingers into the glass, gently picked up the orchid, and placed the orchid on my tongue like a communion wafer. I chewed, chewed, and swallowed, finally laughing. 

Dan did the same. 

- F

Monday, March 2, 2020

An English Honeymoon: Day VI

Before heading all the way to Richmond from Kensington Square on the morning of our sixth day in England, I wrote a quick note to Sadie Lavender, my friends' (Camille and Tyler) little girl who is about three years old now. I bought the postcard at a cheap tourist shop, but I thought she'd like the picture of the old red telephone booth. We walked to the post office and mailed it:


After this and I assume grabbing some breakfast (I don't remember now), we headed to Kew Gardens. This was a day I had been waiting for. I had read about Kew before from a few different places. Notably, Virginia Woolf's book titled Kew Gardens, of which you can find my review here: https://feliciareviewsbooks.blogspot.com/2019/03/kew-gardens-by-virginia-woolf-published.html

I was very excited to see one of the most renowned botanic gardens of all time, particularly because it boasts the most diverse plant life in all the world. We took a bus there, one of those big ones, a double decker, and we almost flew out of our seats a few times, the driver driving a bit haphazardly down narrow city roads, slowly turning into narrow rural(ish) roads. We finally were dropped off at Richmond Park, which we made note to visit again later in the week. We walked past Richmond Park along with small families with babies and toddlers, amazed at the beautiful houses across the way. Did I mention that it was another perfect day? It was warm, with just a slight, very cool breeze coming in now and again, a bit of bluish grey in the sky, but no rain. I loved this walk and wished to live in England forever. Every house was well-tended to. Nothing looked manicured, as lawns and gardens do in the U.S., everything just looked naturally cared for... it's hard to explain. It wasn't sterile like the houses in the U.S. sometimes look. Here are some pictures I took of English roses we found growing around English homes:




And so we walked, following the families towards one of the entrances to Kew. We entered through some back entryway. There weren't too many people there and as soon as I entered I knew I was in for a truly enchanting time among natural wonders, especially old, old, old trees. 



I couldn't help but plop myself down next to this wizened tree and pose for a photograph. I was so happy we had made it inside this amazing place... one of my favorite things is laughing when no joke has been made and laughing not out of spite or disbelief but out of sheer joy. It's one of those great gifts that doesn't come often.



We continued along the pathway, more like a well-groomed dirt walkway, nothing separating us from the growth on either side. We kept to ourselves, admiring the colors, namely greens of all shades. We breathed heavy and with happy sighs. Sighs of some sort of relief. Soon we found the enormous greenhouses.



Palms and flowers and potted pretty things with just enough bits of color, glass and stone smoothed so much it seemed soft to the touch, murmurs of voices of all ages, and heat, heat that crept up on you, slowly. Hardly any wind until you walked past great big spinning fans. There were benches of steel or some other metal with intricate designs, painted white, like those found chipped at old ice cream shops. I began to feel giddy. Baby angels carved lovingly out of stone, their wings supporting the sentience held carefully within.








I forgot to mention, before we went into the greenhouses I had some rosé... and I was really getting a bit warm and giddy with all the sensory immersion. It probably didn't help that I wore a wool dress underneath my coat. I had some time for a picture before I started to feel just a little dizzy and disoriented. Thirsty.


We drank all the water we had kept in my bag. As I started to feel dehydrated and dizzy, Dan and I went outside so I could sit on a bench and get some fresh air. However, there wasn't a water fountain near us, so Dan had to go find the closest one. I couldn't walk (I knew I couldn't unless I wanted to fall over, I've had these kinds of dizzy spells before where I found myself in fetal position on the ground for pushing myself too far), so he left me at the bench alone and went to find a place to buy a bottle of water. Despite feeling all this, I was still super happy. I could've died right then and I would've been OK with that. But I didn't. I waited patiently, breathing in and out, slowing my breathing, watching people pass by. Five minutes passed, ten, fifteen, twenty. Still I waited. When I finally had enough energy and balance I stood up and examined the stairway path that was drawing my eye. It was beautiful. It reminded me of some painting I found once. 



I do believe I am in heaven, I remember thinking to myself. Then I got weak again and sat down. Some twenty minutes later, Dan came back, all in a fluster and red and ruddy and sweating, and passed me the water bottle urgently. 

"There was a line! I'm sorry. I couldn't do anything about it! And the place to get the water was so far away!" 

I laughed and said it was no big deal. Things like this tend to worry Dan a lot and make him nervous, so he sat for a while until I convinced him I was OK to keep going. When his anxiety (which I caused) subsided, we both stood up and went back into the greenhouses, our bodies newly hydrated. An artist named Dale Chihuly's work was on display all over Kew, and I especially like this picture I took of one piece while in the greenhouse:



After exploring the greenhouses a little while longer, we went back outside and maybe got something to eat? We probably did. Oh, man. In whatever the case the order of things happened, one thing to note is that the ice cream at Kew is the BEST. Dan found a station where people were waiting to take a tram. 

"The tram? You really want to take the tram?"  I whined.

And of course he did. Dan's obsessed with trams. I think there's more to it than just wanting to rest and sit. I think perhaps he's worried that we won't get to see as much as we'd like in bigger, open spaces, so he likes to be able to just glance at them and know they are there - which of course trams, with their professional tour guides, help us do.

So here's some "waiting for the tram" photos... I love the twists and turns of the tree trunks and the glittering sunlight that kept appearing every so often... diamonds without form surrounding us every which way. 



I was so glad we decided to take the tram (oops, I mean I was so glad he forced me to take the tram), which dropped us off by what used to be a royal cottage. Rather, we decided to exit the tram and explore that specific area. And around here, what we saw was truly out of a fairy tale. 


If I were fey, this is where I'd play, in the whispering meadows of delicate botany, with their incomprehensible symbols as shapes and signs as patterns, ringlets around bases of the biggest, boldest wooden evergreens, graceful droplets of shadow and light wrapping around itself and opening out into some unfathomable netherworld of trust and care. 





We went to the royal cottage (what a phrase!), walked within its walls seeped in the mystery of history, and walked out, imagining gorgeous horse's hooves and horse smells and horse sounds. 



We came to a clearing with a lake, where an annoying tourist kept talking to us about how to get the proper picture. She wasn't so much annoying because of the mindless talking, but more because she was trampling on the outskirts of the lake to crouch down and photograph... I think toads or frogs. Yes, one of those. Dan and I could see them popping up in the lagoon. There wasn't a pathway in sight, so each time she stepped in we could hear the crunch and mushing of the plants under her weight. We politely ignored her (this is an art form).




We found a peacock a little later on, one which I swear went to modeling school, so vogue was she in her poses. We were really close, too, and she didn't mind. I think... she. Not sure.



We made our way back to the entrance, taking in every second and vision that came with.



And I found some Ents. For real, look at the face on one of them. I said hello, thanking them all for their protective energy that we took into our spirits that day. 





Lastly, we made our way, somewhat sadly, outside of the garden premises. I wish we could've stayed there forever.







- F

Saturday, February 15, 2020

Poem No. 6: From Memory

Down the memory pipe, 
there are mirrors 
I don't wish to return to.

The form of it - a 
kind of missing:
a middle of the night
nightmare gasp,
a sharp inhale,
the murmur 
of a name. 
Or strange dreams 
where I wake up
and ask why?
And hold that close. 

Which is to say,
missing is a memory
already a part of me,
it's buried deep,
a subconscious seeping. 

Or else missing is a kneading
like a cat kneads for her mother
when it already knows there isn't 
a mother to milk; an ingrained action,
no longer meaning the tightly wound knot 
of shared moments lost, but rather the precious
presence of those moments in real-time:
seeking that which isn't there, finding
contentment otherwise in what is. 
Emotional adaptation? I'm not sure. 

But I do tend to miss my mom and
my cat. No one else really. (Maybe
there's a worry aligned with that missing.)

Only because 
our moments 
worth missing
were those experienced
while we were running for our lives
towards where we all are right. now. 
We each know this: there is no time to miss. 
For too long anyway, to dwell on it. To write on it. 

I once wished for a room with everything I've lost. Items, I mean. Eye-glasses. Rings. Stolen clothes. A diamond earring. Gifts. A blue velvet ballet flat in the middle of a tunnel. Each time I'd felt so bad for losing the thing, for it was worth money and/or it was a symbol of a relationship, you know, like a matching friendship bracelet.  That missing I didn't want to feel of the lost thing would come back if I only saw it, held it in my hands like a forgotten relic, talisman, protecting its wearer from the very thing this is all about: missing. 

Oh! The thing I miss most: the piano. I just remembered. Not then, with the knife chopping in the background or the television blaring on about roses and bachelors. I don't even miss it for now - there's no where it could go. I miss it for the future, a future enveloped safely in silence until the first strike of the first key. 

Saturday, January 25, 2020

Poem No. 5: Pity

Squandering is hard. 
I'd like to believe  
you know this,
but I'm not so sure.

We make it seem
easy. To entertain - 
to be entertained - 
to pleasure - 
to feel pleasured
by another,
through warmth
by conversation
through settling in 
common ground,
to have the opportunity
for boredom to become
friendship, the best
present of them all,
an honor that requires
nothing to give,
nothing to take.

(Because you won't
find it if you're not looking.
Stillness is a movement 
that allows for nothing 
to happen, to really 
happen so we can turn 
our insides out. And 
later, laugh real laughs 
at the soul-carrying face.
So it's hard to find fellow
squanderers when no one 
looks. But luckily
for me, I can name a few.)

Though I've squandered alone.
It's against your rules, but
tell me, is squandering so
different than daydreaming?
Staring out into space,
thinking, forgetting where
you are in wondering without
thought, in feeling the simple
fact of existing: asking that 
question: Am I really here?
I know, for some, that causes
fear. It never did me. I 
like pure sentience. And 
playing with it. Like light
through fingertips, like
a song emanating from 
my mouth, but not knowing 
from where. What is a 
mouth? A song?

I don't know 
in this instance
how to speak directly
to your musings on
production, waste,
excess, punishment,
time pre-spent (to what end?)
Capital, wealth, and
decadence.. the sun.

But (I think)
I get it, and 
I know
I like it.
I'll be able
to speak to it
one day. You 
said something 
about cooking?
I don't really
know how.
Were there days
we just found food?
To burn, to eat.

I'm aware of
oxygen thieves (as a
teacher used to say):
when a body stays
as merely a refusal 
of anyone else being there,
I wonder why?
To that lie 
I'm sorry for this truth:
how sad. 

Pigeons

Either they ate too much junk - spilled popcorn and Cheetos spilled over the abandoned alleyways - or instead consumed some sort of poison a...